Aspects of a Life Worth Living
Who am I?
Time to share my world with you. I am ready to take off the mask and knock down the walls that I have had surrounding my innermost self for as long as I can remember and admit to some fundamental reasons behind many of the misconceptions, as to who I am, as experienced by others who have ventured into my world.
I realise I am but one tiny voice among the billions on this incredible planet. Nevertheless I am hopeful that many, coming from similar situations, and perhaps some of the same problems, will not only understand where I am coming from but also be able to relate with what I am doing and how I will go forward. If this helps just one person then I will be overjoyed.
The voice inside me needs to be free and heard, hence the question, ‘Who am I’. Why? I have no idea, but as my Soul Energy is Rising right now it is time for me to embrace all that I am for once instead of withdrawing into myself and hiding behind the walls I created to protect my very being. For the very first time I truly believe that my life was and is worth living. Perhaps it was all about learning to be who I am and then being able to bring, as now, my experiences to anyone who is willing to hear my voice.
My insights below are accompanied by images of mother nature and all she has to offer.
Insights into my introverted world.
With images to calm the senses.
Why is it so difficult to put my thoughts into words - I have so many things in my head telling me not to share my thoughts but another part of me knows it is about time I opened up and looked at myself with different eyes. Sound strange, yes, to me too but you know somewhere along the way I lost myself under a mire of responsibility and doing the 'right thing'. I am sure many of you out there have this imprinted on your brain too.
Trying to write down my thoughts without thinking is hard - the teacher in me wants me to slow down and think about what I am saying but if I do then when I try and write it becomes pale. Words without the feelings. My aim is to talk to you as if we are having a conversation, I of course will be speaking about my life and I hope you will be listening. Perhaps my life is not very important for many people out there and it is how I have felt for so many years that, on reflection, this is quite scary. So it is about time I came out from deep undercover.
I have to say it frightens me and several times I have started this website and then left it. Ten years I have had this domain name and it is only now that I think I am beginning to realise its significance to me and my life. Soul Energy Rising - what on earth is that supposed to mean and why ten years ago did I buy it. A few weeks ago I realised that if only in the smallest of ways my life has actually made a difference to other people then it has been a life worth living.
I don't think any of us really understand how we can be of importance or help others make changes to their lives and most of us don't believe we do - as I thought. So what is Soul Energy and why do I believe mine is Rising - enough to start this website. Ha! Ha! if I am honest I have no idea. However, a few weeks ago it was as if I was waking up from a life of feeling abandoned, rejected, unworthy into a life that, looking back, I can be quite proud of and wanted to share with others who have felt this way too.
I had so many battles to be fought, so many bogs to walk through, so many heartaches to cope with, so many shattered illusions. Putting people on pedestals and expecting them to feel as I do is an impossibility. So many years of thinking that others have the same loyalty, commitment, honesty as I do only to be devastated when it was not forthcoming.
I think my soul energy has truly realised at long last that no matter what anyone thinks of me I need to remain true to myself and do what I consider the right thing to do - as long as this is done with good intent and will harm no-one.
This is why it is rising, sounds crazy doesn't it! Having said that it was like an epiphany and awakening as I suddenly realised I wanted to get out there in the world and talk about my life, the trials, tribulations and more so that perhaps, even if it just gave a few people the strength to carry on, then once again I have made a small difference.
I thought I would try and section particular aspects of my life to tell you about them as each and every one made me into the person I am today and in each and every one there was probably some sort of battle going on whether on or under the surface and sometimes without me even realising.
I have a page relating to each of these in Elements under ‘One Woman’ as well as adding my my creativity under ‘JenuArt’.
In between looking after my rescue dogs and cats and trying to set up this website - there is more to come - I have started a blog about my life as it is at the moment and how what I am doing on a daily basis goes towards my dreams of the future.
So everyone who is out there reading this, I hope I can help you overcome things that you feel at this moment in time are impossible and you can look to the future knowing that someone else has been there, done that and come out smiling. Please enjoy what this website has to offer.